Failure.

assalamualaikum, readers(: 

Today, I faced another failure. It was tough. Going through once again. Seeing my results over and over again. Locked in my room and keep on crying. Because I expected it to be like that. Because the module bore me and I just want to get away with it but I couldn't. I was trapped with the decision that I made. I realized that I took things for granted. I took it easy hoping that Allah will grants me my wish without doing anything. 

I forgot for once that Allah hears everything. In fact, HE knew everything right from the start. We plan it but HE decides it. I forgot his existence and I forgot to be grateful to him. I forgot him when I was happy or sad. I was too busy looking for something to make myself happy. In times like this, when I have my fall, when I face this again, then I remember Allah. 

I should've learnt my lesson but I never did. I am that ungrateful. I wanted to be in a good books of others but not Allah. Now, isn't the time to regret? 

I need to accept this. Even when I cry the whole bucket, it won't go back to the past. It won't so I have to do this again. I have to try harder. Push harder. Because it's for the future. Keep on pushing myself. Because I tend to be lazy at the wrong time. And, I gave up on myself halfway, I shouldn't have. I should not at all. 

 I will focus on this final semester before the repeat module.
push harder, Zulaikha! 
GOGO! 

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