Untitled #1.

Your smile.
Your little pride. 
Your way of thinking. 
Your past. 

I was in your past. 
I saw how vulnerable you were.
How you were afraid that you will not be in heaven if you defy your dad's orders. 
How you would always put your parents first when I knew it was hard for you sometimes. 

And that was mad respect actually. 
All I could do was listen to you. 
And secretly prayed Allah will ease your affairs. 

8 years later,  you changed. 
Eversince you had this job. 
I am not blaming this job because every job is rezeki from Allah.
I had not met you for years. 
So I blamed myself for not being there enough. 

But, this wasn't the change that I was expecting.
Where was the person I had respect for? 
Where was the person that uphold family values and religion?
Where was the person that motivated me secretly to become a better person? 

I was sad. 
Disappointed.
In myself. 
For not being there all these years. 

Little things of you I remembered clearly. 
Your pure innocence. 
Your dimples.
Your smile. 
Your family values.

8 years, I was still the old me.
But, you wasn't the same.